that's what he said.

on repeat: "love brings change" - jamie foxx

seems like even if i don't go out, i end up spending money on shopping so either way i lose. well kinda, because i love the things i purchase haha

ive been having such a hard time sleeping and waking up for work the past couple weeks. not good. especially since i result to buying coffee to get me through the day. on a good note, work has been great as of late. been keeping really busy and having more opportunities to shine. even though im paranoid that my boss hates my guts (since she constantly passes by when im gchatting or texting) everyday im feeling more and more comfortable. i think i've proven myself the past week handling patients on my own while my coordinator was out for a family emergency. i can totally take on a study by myself!

i should sleep but my head is overflowed with "SIGH's" right now.

I Love You

In this moment of feeling very "Carrie Bradshaw," I pour my heart out:

Every guy who's said those darn three words to me have somehow managed to break my heart into pieces. And every time my defense was, "if you LOVE me, then why are you HURTING me?" Or even better, "but I thought you LOVED me?" Needless to say that those three words have more than lost their meaning. I see them as nothing but useless, meaningless, and full of lies. Thus, my guard has been up ever since to protect myself from any kind of hurt from the opposite sex. Avoid a broken heart by avoiding love. Or at least that's what I thought. Until recently, I've learned of a different kind of love. Love that is unspoken of yet, so strong that words are not even necessary to describe the feeling. Even so, there are moments when I wanna scream "I am sooo in LOVE with you!" Still, it remained what it is...a wonderful secret. Forgive me for accidentally speaking aloud. It feels as if I hurt a best friend by letting others in on our secret. Suddenly I'm back to where I've started with love. No matter what, I guess in some way it can still creep up and crack your heart unexpectedly...even if it has good intentions. I'm not trying to offend anyone else with their experiences in love, I just wanted to let you know mine. And so the guard goes up again...

I'd like to make a promise to myself. The next time I will ever speak of those three words to a man, will be to my husband on our wedding day. At least then maybe, he just might say it and mean it :)

Buzz

I wish we could have one big ol' 06 reunion...I miss Berk and all it's good times. It amazes me everyday how so grown and so wonderful we all are.

Maybe it's just pms but ...can I get something back?

Man this is a good buzz! Which is I I'm trying my best to type right.

Wow wow wow.

I'm hungry.

Whatevs....it was an in the moment kinda thang.

Ooops

March Madness

Or lack there of...

Just got done with a busy month and looking into my calendar for March, it's totally empty until Mike comes at the end of the month. This kinda excites me because I wanna save money soo bad but trips and random things I fall in love with consume my wallet.

Snowboarding is 10x funner when you hardly fall. Makes me wanna buy a board. (There goes a random thing I fell in love with.) I still can't believe we got sunburned in the snow and it was soo hot at Big Bear that I could walk around in a t-shirt. Is that really wrong or what??

I'm sleepy and cannot believe what the bachelor just did. What a true jerk. I hate broken hearts...with that said, I end with this:

"My shattered dreams, and broken heart...." Haha, don't worry..the song doesn't pertain to me. I just really love the song.

i amuse myself

I got a rose over the weekend...aka, runny nose. lately i have been putting words together to make one word. why i do this? i have no idea and didn't even notice until mike pointed it out. it cracks me up how clever i can be.